Lady Gaga, “Yaaaaas Queen” source: flickr/Jason H. Smith

By Riane Konc

-That is acceptable.

-Indeed.

-Sure (but I’m in a good mood).

-Sure (but I just binge-watched all of Broad City).

-Sure (but I just binge-watched all of Ru Paul’s Drag Race).

-Upon brief reflection, I agree with your general premise.

-I did not hear what you said, but the general reaction of my peers leads me to believe that the plans put forth are acceptable, and I’m a follower.

-We have been texting back and forth for quite some time, and while I do not necessarily feel excited by what you are suggesting, I am basically fine with it, and since a “sure” in a text message can be misread as angry or annoyed, I have decided to respond enthusiastically in order to avoid conflict or misunderstanding.

-You, an old high school friend who is in town, have just cancelled our plans to get coffee and “catch-up” and while I was excited about it in theory, I was dreading it in practice, and so when you followed up your cancellation by saying, “But next time I’m in town we’ll totally hang out, right?” I agreed with the optimistic vigor characteristic of someone who just found out she can stay on her couch all day and watch Netflix and is convinced that in six months or so, she will indeed want to get coffee and catch up (she will not).

-Yes.

-Maybe, but I want to sound confident.

-I’m completely ignorant of the myriad ways that white heteronormative culture co-opts the language of historically marginalized communities, managing somehow to both take credit for and effectively ruin it at the same time.

-LET’S GET FRO-YO, BITCHES!

Looking For A Comments Section? We Don’t Have One.

]]>