“give your daughters difficult names.
give your daughters names that command the full use of tongue.
my name makes you want to tell me the truth.
my name doesn’t allow me to trust anyone that cannot pronounce it right.”
― Warsan Shire
This week, we learned the world is a lot more like an episode of ‘Black Mirror’ than an episode of ‘Black Mirror’ could be. As we come to terms with the deep technological betrayal of privacy and trust, and have long discussions over whether to delete our Facebook accounts, consider that in so many parts of the world, using Facebook is not a luxury, it’s a lifeline. It’s a necessary connection to information, to jobs, to access.
Hitting “deactivate account” is a privilege we get to have: We don’t even have to bother engaging in the fight for privacy. Will you fight anyway, or will you walk away?
Speaking of Facebook, when I posted about a challenge far too many people of color face — that of carrying the undue burden of correcting people about the proper pronunciation of our names—a white person insisted my views were incorrect. “For the record, white people deal with it too when they have names like Dominique,” she argued on my timeline.
Sometimes, the conversation is not about you. You can, for example, be a man who hears a woman saying “me too,” without quickly crying out “not all men!” You could hear a woman say “me too,” without saying it back. You can even listen to another person’s oppression, without jumping in to tell your own stories of oppression.
Sometimes, we don’t want to hear “me too.” Sometimes, “I’m sorry you’re going through that,” is fine. And sometimes, words will never be enough.
With love + solidarity,
Ruchika Tulshyan
Founding Editor
Can It Be Healing For A Sexual Assault Survivor To Communicate With A Harasser?
By Andrea Hannah
The #MeToo movement has illuminated what it takes to truly heal: connection, sisterhood, and the willingness to look at pain head-on.
I know that I alone can’t heal the kind of soul-sucking void Greg has written about, and I reject the individual responsibility of even trying. But because of the courage of so many survivors bringing their pain to light,
I’m strong enough to have these conversations with him. I’m willing enough to witness his own acceptance of his void, and I’m attempting to answer the call of my own questions:
What can I do about this to change the course of the future?
How can I be brave enough to speak up, especially when I fear for the safety of other women?
How can I make sure my daughter and others never have to scream #MeToo?
The Legislation That Would Harm Sex Workers — In The Name Of Their Own Protection
By Alex MK
Whether they utilize Facebook groups, other online forums, or even text group chats, sex workers’ ability to communicate with one another and screen potential clients is one of the only security mechanisms available to them .
It’s one that will be further compromised, with assuredly fatal consequences, if the supposed anti-trafficking bill, FOSTA, passes the Senate this week.
FOSTA will make our lives exponentially more dangerous under the pretense of protecting us.
When You’re Autistic, Abuse Is Considered Love
By Aaron Kappel
We need to be able to speak for ourselves, but instead, #ActuallyAutistic voices are too often shunned and silenced, while the voices of allistic (non-autistic) parents raising autistic children are lifted up and praised.
A common retort to the autistic adults who condemn this genre of writing and alleged advocacy is that our viewpoint is inconsequential because we aren’t autistic enough.
Our needs don’t compare to the mountain of needs their children require because we are able to raise our voices and organize, and by doing so, we are making things harder for autistic people — like their children — who require more care.
Tips On Filling Out Your March Madness Bracket For Whose Time Is Up Next
By Kristin Nalivaika
Filling out brackets can be daunting. Especially when, in industries varying from entertainment to journalism to government, so many people brought their A game to disgusting, inappropriate behavior in 2017!
Some of these individuals have experienced the spotlight of accusation in prior seasons, but the lack of results have kept on disappointing us year after year. Other entrants are fresh faces appearing in the tournament for the first time.
There are a million different combinations for the 68 individuals in the bracket who have not yet suffered appropriate consequences for their despicable actions. If you want any chance of winning your office pool, here are some tips on picking the Final Four creeps.